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GOAL SETTING PART 2

Sonia was opportune to read SEA publication for the month of May, and she was highly impressed and therefore made up her mind to start setting Goals. Picking up her phone she dialled my number which she saw at the back of the publication and expressed her excitement. During our discussion, she asked two very important questions.

She said SEA,
1. What categories of my life do I need to set goals on?

2. What are the foundations for establishing a goal?

I was surprised by her intelligent question, and with a smile on my face, I asked her to sit back, relax and enjoy the publication for June because I would be focusing on her brainy questions.

WHAT CATEGORIES OF MY LIFE DO I NEED TO SET GOALS ON?
I would be pointing out nine crucial categories.

1. Spiritual Goals: These are goals that relate to your religious belief, your faith, and your spiritual growth. These goals give strong answer to how many hours I need to spend per day praying, how many hours I use for praises, would I be fasting once in a week or once in a month, how I would start or continuing paying my tithe and offering and some other spiritual issues. These answers come when you set spiritual goals.

2. Personal Goals: This is a very important part of goal setting. These are goals relating to your personal growth, character development, how you attend to live issues and address them. These goals give resilient solutions to how do I want my life to be planned, what characters do I need to drop, what character do I need to possess, what do I need to change about the way I address practical life issues and what part of my life needs time for personal growth and some other key personal issues.

3. Career Goals: This goals give answers to what career do I want to pursue, how do I intend to pursue this career, what course do I need to study to be able to pursue this career, what degrees do I need to hold to be able to practise this career, what professional exams do I need to write to give me higher chances of getting this career, what networks do I need to build to acquire this career, what projects do I need to work on to make me stand out in this career.

4. Financial Goals: These are goals relating to money matter relating to income growth, savings and investments. How do you intend to start saving from the money received, what unnecessary spending’s would you have to reduce to save more, how do you intend to start growing your finance positively, through the utilisation of your talent or starting up a business, what kind of business would you like to invest on, how do you intend to get the money to start the business.

5. Family: These are goals set to strengthen bonds with your siblings, partners, relatives, parents and children’s.

6. Friends: These goals answer thoughts provoking questions like who do I intend to strengthen my friendship with, and who do I intend to weaken my friendship with, what particular area do I need to strengthen my relationship with some people, is it in business, reading, brain-storming, religious, relaxation or in two or more areas, what kind of character should my friend possess and what character should my friend not possess.

7. Community: It is always important to spend your time helping those round you with your talents and the resources within your disposal to ensure that you have a better community. This give answers to questions like how can I get involved with my community work, is there any way I can pull my own strength to ensure that my community is better, how am I going to ensure that I make my community better, how many hours am I going to be putting into community service every month.

8. Recreation: Work and no play they say make’s Sonia, a dull girl. These are goals relating to relaxation renewal, taking your timeout to do the things you like, for example swimming, playing football, playing video games and watching of movies and travelling on vacations and excursions. Much time should not be spent on these goals.

9. Health: Goals relating to what you eat, if you would be reducing the level at which you take sweet things or at which you take salt, doing exercises either on a daily, weekly or monthly basics, going for medical check-up every month or yearly, how many hours would be spent on resting and overall health and wellbeing of the body.

WHAT ARE THE FOUNDATIONS FOR ESTABLISHING A GOAL?
Every goal must be on the S-M-A-R-T foundation.

Every goal you set must be;

1. S – Specific: being specific means to be precise and to be decisive with your goals. What do you desire and want to achieve, there is no sitting on the fence, there is no either A or B, I am ok. You must always choose a goal and stick to it, either you want first class or you want a two-one degree from the university, there is nothing like I am ok with any of the two. Being specific makes you more determined to achieve what you really want to achieve.

2. M – Measurable: A student that wants to have a first class would start knowing If he has been working towards that goal when he starts seeing his test and assignment results. A measurable goal helps you know if you are achieving the goal, if you are working towards the direction of the goal or you are far from the direction of the goal, helps you identify your strengths and expose your weakness. This ensures that you detect your defaults errors) before they become too late to correct.

3. A – Achievable: Can you achieve your goals? Are you willing to achieve these goals? There is no point setting a goal when there is no internal will to achieve such a goal. Every goal must first be achieved in your mind before it is brought to paper, if it is achieved in your mind, you can plan well to achieve it. For every goal that would be achieved is an action plan that would
make the goal achievable.

4. R – Relevant: Like we said earlier, goals are the necessary steps taken to achieve your vision; so therefore, your goal must be relevant to your vision. A guy that wants to be a singer in the nearest future must understand that he must be able to set specific and measurable goals that are relevant to him achieving his dream of becoming a musician.

5. T – Time conscious: A vision is a goal with a DEADLINE, and that deadline signifies time limit. There must be a particular time the goal must expire just like the football match ends roughly after 90 minutes. It makes the goal more planned for, organised and precise.
Seun Emmanuel Alaofin (SEA)

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40 KEY POINTS ON RELATIONSHIP FROM SEA PUBLICATION TEAM.

1. Define your relationship. Know if you are just dating, for marriage, or friends with benefit.

2. Every relationship starts with God. A partner that does not know God can never be loyal.

3. Every relationship is peculiar; don’t compare your relationship with someone else’s relationship.

4. Patience is a key factor in every relationship. Practise it.

5. Respect is very important in every relationship and it is meant to be from both parties.

6. In every relationship, both partners have to have the same core values.

7. When you forget your 1st love which is God, you would not find a real 2nd love.

8. No trust = No relationship. There is no need to be in a relationship when there is no trust.

9. There must be mutual understanding in every relationship.

10. Always remember to appreciate your partner for always being there for you. It goes a long way.

11. Both partners must be compatible with each other.

12. Know the likes and dislikes of your partner.

13. Know the weakness and strength of your partner.

14. Don’t enter any relationship out of pity.

15. A relationship is a 50 – 50 situation. Both parties must participate and they must be beneficial to each other.

16. A man that has no plan for his life has no plan for you.

17. True love is the foundation of a real relationship.

18. If the purpose of your relationship is not known, abuse is inevitable.

19. Don’t enter into a relationship just because you want to know how a relationship looks like.

20. Don’t go for a partner because he or she makes you smile, but go for a partner that would always do things that would leave you with that smile.

21. Pretence = no good relationship

22. Check your partner well. Check his/her heart if he/she has a conscience.

23. There is always a point of attraction in every relationship. Don’t forget that.

24. Don’t go for a player, go for a real man.

25. Jealousy is an important factor in every relationship, but when it becomes too much it kills the relationship.

26. Relationship involves sacrifice of time, money and physical attraction.

27. Don’t enter into one when you would not have the time.

28. Maturity is very important in every relationship

29. If a man loves you because of what you have, he would see a better one. Don’t be deceived.

30. If a woman loves you because you are handsome and your pocket is heavy, she would see a more handsome man. Don’t fall a maga.

31. It’s good to be able to say your mind, but too many complaints lead to fast breakup.

32. A partner that is not proud to work with you on the street is not the right choice for you.

33. In every relationship, don’t make yourself an option and your partner a priority.

34. A person you don’t have a future with is not worth dating.

35. In every relationship, you don’t always have to hurt your partner for you to strike your point that you are right.

36. Listening to gossips from external bodies about your partner and believing them is a good way of using your hand to call for break up.

37. Don’t compare your present partner with your ex-partner. Remember that they are different and special in their unique ways.

38. In every relationship, don’t go for beauty. Go for someone that makes your life beautiful. True fact.

39. Don’t talk about break up every time you have little arguments with your partner.

40. Your partner is not a magician. Don’t expect him or her to know all that is in your mind when you did not open up.

It is better to keep your mouth closed than say the word ‘’I LOVE YOU’’ when you don’t mean it.

PRICE TAG 2

Some few weeks ago, I did a little piece on PRICE TAG which from its responses and comments have been of tremendous impact. Despite that, some few requested for more INSIGHTS. Join me as we journey on/through this smooth SAIL of words that are transforming, beneficial, charging, changing and catalytic.

The PRICE of a product is the worth and value placed on it while the TAG is an identifiable piece which reflects physically a particular thing or the other. Therefore, a price tag is a piece (identifiable) which connotes the WORTH of a product; commodity or whatever is associated to the tag.

WHAT COULD BE PAYED FOR?
Every individual or group have what they respectively intend to or are paying for. It could be the PRICE for achievements, fame, heights, scholarships, grades, greatness, and freedom, success either in business, family, career and lots more.

WHY I SHOULD PAY? Driving it home—–
A man who is not ready to pay the required PRICE should expect no PRIZE. A priceless life is a prize less one.

Each price comes with its own respective RISK. Strategize properly and create positive TRICKS to overcome.

Often times, we could be reluctant with meeting-up with the demands of the TAGS. I call this a DRAG.

There is the human nature which makes us lazy about price-paying. Similar to the force of gravity, this nature acts against our desires to be price-payers. This is a force called the PULL.

To overcome this pull, we have to exert another force called the PUSH because for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.

The only word spoken to a woman in labour is the word PUSH. The force concentrated at that moment is the PULL but she has to PUSH, PUSH and PUSH until the baby is delivered.
If you would want to attain heights, achieve your dreams and birth your success, you obviously have to PUSH harder.

You must be willing to ACCEPT and DO the PRICE and not REJECT it so as not to UNDO the PRIZE.

If you must be the BEST, CONTEST, overcome the TEST so as to be better than the REST.

When you ASK and YEARN for more, you would have been able to solve more TASKS and EARN more accolades.

Pay the price and be RESPECTED, avoid the price and be NEGLECTED. Pay the price and become BRANDED, avoid it and remain STRANDED.

Would you want to RULE your world and be properly POSITIONED on the map, pay the required price?

HOW DO I PAY THE PRICE?
Paying for an item in a mart requires of you to follow a PROCESS. This process could either be through cash payment or many other means depending on the capacity of such a mart. It is when this process is DULY followed that such an item becomes yours eventually.

Every attainable height has a PROCESS (a right one) that must be discovered. Strategize and plan ahead on how to over-ride the HURDLES contained therein so as to maintain your pace and keep moving forward despite the BUMPS.

After the DISCOVERY of the process, it is then questions of how WILLED, DRIVEN and DESIRING are you not to relent but to go/get through the process?

Remember, DISCOVER, STUDY, WORK-ON, CARESS, STAY TRUE, REMAIN POSITIVE, GO, GET through the PROCESS and be a huge SUCCESS. I choose to be a price-payer and a fruit-reaper.

WHAT IS YOUR OWN DECISION?

AGBARA PAZKAL LEO

FOLLOW ON TWITTER: @paazkal

BLOG PAGE: agbarap.wordpress.com

LAUGH OFF THE STRESS SEGMENT with MALLAM D (AKPOS SENIOR BROTHER)

There was a man who worked for the post office, whose work was to process the mails that had illegible address. One day, a letter came addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no actual address. He thought he should open it to see what it was about.

The letter read:

Dear God,

I am an 83year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday, someone stole my purse. It had 100dollars in it, which was all the money I had until my next pension payment. The next Sunday, I have invited two of my friends over for dinner, and without that money I would not be able to buy food for them. I have no family to turn to, you are my only hope lord. Can you please help me?

Sincerely,

Agnes.

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to his other workers. Each one dug into his or her wallet and came up with a few dollars. By the time he made the rounds, he had collected 96 dollars, which they put into an envelope and sent it to the woman.

The rest of the day, all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Agnes and the dinner she is going to share with her friends. Sunday came and left, and after a few days another letter came from the same old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened.

It read:

Dear God,

How can I ever thank you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love, I was able to fix a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

By the way, 4 dollars was missing from the money, and I think it might have been those thief’s at the post office that stole the money.

HMM, WHAT A WORLD.

NIGERIA OR NIGERIANS (A CHARGE TO ALL NIGERIANS)

I don’t want to know the numbers of publications you have read about
Nigeria but I bet you after reading this you will have a change of mind.

I am blessed, I am rich, I am very productive, I have a fertile land, I have reasonable human resources at my fingertips, I have a very perfect atmospheric condition yet I am never appreciated, I have always lived In agony because my name have been battered with insults and accusations am not even guilty of, I am Nigeria and my soul seeks for justice.

Nigeria as we all know is a country that is blessed with a lot of resources both human and natural resources but still fails to meet up with the level of advanced countries in the 21st century, as such, a question is asked; what is the problem? Is it Nigeria or you?

Fellow Nigerian, either you like it or not, you and I are responsible for the situation of this country today. We are the criminals that cheat on our brothers and sisters, we are the government officials that divert public funds, we are the ones responsible for Inflations, we are the ones that have murdered justice and open the door to Insecurity, and we have accepted corruption as a way of life and have assassinated social sanity. We are all guilty of these offences yet we have failed to take responsibilities for our actions just like our forefathers and shift the blame on a defenseless country that has no advocate. We are the problems of this country.
Instead of repeating the same problems about Nigeria that even a five year old child already knows why not let us think about providing solutions to the problems we have created.

As a Nigerian, I refuse to conform to the unethical norms operating in this country. Martin Luther king (Jr) once said ‘conformity is a jailer of freedom and enemy of growth’. Let us stand out together and produce the change this country is crying for.
ABIODUN BANKOLE (HARRY POTTER).

9 STEPS TO IMPROVING SELF-ESTEEM

If you want to improve your self-esteem, here are some steps to start empowering yourself:

1. Try to stop thinking negative thoughts about yourself: If you’re used to focusing on your shortcomings, start thinking about positive aspects of yourself that outweigh them. When you catch yourself being too critical, counter it by saying something positive about yourself. Each day, write down three things about yourself that make you happy.

2. Aim for accomplishments rather than perfection.

3. View mistakes as learning opportunities: Accept that you will make mistakes because everyone does. Mistakes are part of learning. Remind yourself that a person’s talents are constantly developing, and everyone excels at different things — it’s what makes people interesting.

4. Recognize what you can change and what you can’t: If you realize that you’re unhappy with something about yourself that you can change, and then start today. If it’s something you can’t change (like your height), then start to work toward loving yourself the way you are.

5. Set goals: Think about what you’d like to accomplish, and then make a plan for how to do it. Stick with your plan and keep track of your progress.

6. Take pride in your opinions and ideas. Don’t be afraid to voice them.

7. Make a contribution: Tutor a classmate who’s having trouble, help clean up your neighborhood, participate in a walkathon for a good cause, or volunteer your time in some other way. Feeling like you’re making a difference and that your help is valued can do wonders to improve self-esteem.

8. Have fun: Ever found yourself thinking stuff like “I’d have more friends if I were thinner”? Enjoy spending time with the people you care about and doing the things you love. Relax and have a good time — and avoid putting your life on hold.

9. It’s never too late to build healthy, positive self-esteem. In some cases where the emotional hurt is deep or long lasting, it can require the help of a mental health professional, like a counselor or therapist. These experts can act as a guide, helping people learn to love themselves and realize what’s unique and special about them.

KEMI SPECIAL

SOCIETAL QUEST FOR A QUALITY LEADER: BASICS OF LEADERSHIP.

I have a strong sense of what our course of action needs to be, are we going to keep on growing, or is there anything called GROWTH in our society.
I looked at every possible alternative for the competence of a quality leader and I could not get a befitting replacement for this term called “LEADER” and I concluded that there is need for quality leaders to lead the people in their organization or anywhere they find themselves in order to make an effective change that is desired for growth.

Without going out of the context of this topic, “who is a leader”? Very many people will define this six letters word in several ways depending on the aspect which it appears to them. But really if I were to ask you what do you understand by the word leader what will you say? Taking a cue from a discussion I engaged when coming from Abuja, there was an argument on the question, who is a leader?

A man said a leader is a person who caters for the people under him alone. I was thinking of his reply for a while, and I then decided to oppose this man who was actually a political oriented man. I said sir with due respect, I oppose your definition of your leadership and I told him point blank that by his definition, he had actually talked on the benefit of loyalty and not leadership.

Back to the point, WHO IS A LEADER? IN MY OWN WORDS, A leader simply means a person who leads or show the way to a group of people, organization, nation or firm. He has a mission and vision, and he ensures that the mission and vision is achieved collectively with everybody involved participating as a team and every member also benefiting.

Leadership on the other hand is the ability to make a system produce the set goals of an organization or a nation. The common goal that is set majorly depends on who the leader is.
Many of our so called leaders today majorly are as good as their followers and in the normal context a leader is meant to be more knowledgeable than the people he is leading because he decides the way and how the organization he is dealing with should be runned, but it is unfortunate that the leaders of nowadays lack vision and have no good mission. That is why the menace of bad leadership has erupted and become so rampant in all sectors of our society today.

Leadership is all about sacrifice and doing the right thing all the time.
The fact is everybody has the ability to do the right thing but most of us think it is impossible to do, but remember your mentality will either make or mar you. Many organizations are looking for a quality leader that can judiciously use their resources to achieve the mission and vision of their firm and also ensuring that the followers are not suffering at the expense of such a development because any development that affects the welfare of the people is not the best.

To succeed as a leader, there is always a place of learning and practice of leadership. The number of people you can influence positively to do the right thing. All firms need quality leaders, nations need, religious organizations need and all other sectors. Everybody works as a team to achieve the result and the credit is for all.

Don’t be an agent of destruction all in the name of being a leader, the more the society needs you, the more you need the society. We can have a corrupt free society, if only you can avoid corruption and join the force of those seeking for a just and secured society.
Jeremiah Emiola Olawale (JEW)
Coordinator of All Leaders Platform, Africa.

SIMPLE 9 HABITS TO DEVELOP FINANCIAL STABILITY AND SUCCESS

Just like any goal, getting your finances stable and becoming financially successful requires the development of good financial habits. I’ve been doing some researches on this topic extensively in the last few weeks in my quest to eliminate debt, increase my savings and increase financial security for me and my family.

I’ll talk more about these habits individually, but wanted to list them in a summary.

Here they are, in no particular order:

1. MAKE SAVINGS AUTOMAGICAL: This should be your top priority, especially if you don’t have a solid emergency fund yet. Make it the first bill you pay each payday, by having a set amount automatically transferred from your checking account to your savings (try an online savings account). Don’t even think about this transaction — just make sure it happens, each and every payday.

2. CONTROL YOUR IMPULSE SPENDING: The biggest problem for many of us. Impulse spending, on eating out and shopping and online purchases, is a big drain on our finances, the biggest budget breaker for many, and a sure way to be in dire financial straits. Learn to minimize or stop these spending’s.

3. EVALUATE YOUR EXPENSES and LIVE FRUGALLY: If you’ve never tracked your expenses, then evaluate how you’re spending your money, and see what you can cut out or reduce. Decide if each expense is absolutely necessary, and then eliminate the unnecessary.

4. INVEST IN YOUR FUTURE: If you’re young, you probably don’t think about retirement much. But it’s important. Even if you think you can always plan for retirement later, do it now. The growth of your investments over time will be amazing if you start in your 20s.

5. KEEP YOUR FAMILY SECURE: The first step is to save for an emergency fund, so that if anything happens, you’ve got the money. If you have a spouse and/or dependents, you should definitely get life insurance and make a will — as soon as possible! Also research other insurance, such as homeowner’s or renter’s insurance.

6. ELIMINATE AND AVOID DEBT: If you’ve got credit cards, personal loans, or other such debt, you need to start a debt elimination plan. List out your debts and arrange them in order from smallest balance at the top too largest at the bottom. Then focus on the debt at the top, putting as much as you can into it, even if it’s just #500-1000 extra (more would be better).

When that amount is paid off, celebrate! Then take the total amount you were paying (say #1500 minimum payment plus the #500 extra for a total of #2000) and add that to the minimum payment of the next largest debt. Continue this process, with your extra amount snowballing as you go along, until you pay off all your debts. This could take several years, but it’s a very rewarding process, and very necessary.

7. USE THE ENVELOPE SYSTEM: This is a simple system to keep track of how much money you have for spending. Let’s say you set aside three amounts in your budget each payday — one for gas, one for groceries, one for eating out. Withdraw those amounts on payday, and put them in three separate envelopes. That way, you can easily track how much you have left for each of these expenses, and when you run out of money, you know it immediately. You don’t overspend in these categories. If you regularly run out too fast, you may need to re-think your budget.

8. READ ABOUT PERSONAL FINANCES: The more you educate yourself and get information, the better your finances will be.

9. LOOK TO GROW YOUR NET WORTH: Do whatever you can to improve your net worth, either by reducing your debt, increasing your savings, or increasing your income, or all of the above. Look for new ways to make money, or to get paid more for what you do. Over the course of months, if you calculate your net worth each month, you’ll see it grow. And that feels great!!!

Apply these simple procedures and you’ll see your financial stability improving on a daily basis.

@ShugarAndSpice_ on twitter

GOAL SETTING PART ONE

I would be discussing on the topic GOAL SETTING FOR THE NEXT few MONTHS because I realised that it is one of the necessary actions taken to succeed in life.

GOALS in my own simple words are the steps and actions taken to achieve a vision. There is no GOAL without a vision, and a wish or a dream is a vision without a GOAL (action and deadline).

Let’s take a case study, of a student who just got admission into FUTA, and is working towards coming out with a first class by the end of his five years in the great institute of learning. That is his vision. This student must have to plan over time on how to achieve this vision, and this is what results into goals. Since the student is going to be using five years which is equivalent to ten semesters and at the end of every semester is an examination, the student has to plan well on how he would perform excellently in each of this semester which would accumulate to give him the vision he has always desired at the end of this 10 semesters. He has to know that he must have a first class every semester and that to get this first class he has to dedicate a lot of his time to his study.

Just imagine how a football match would look like without a goal post. It would be meaningless, time wasting and of less importance, but when the goal post is in place, the match becomes competitive, it becomes more important and every single minute counts because each team would be able to score goals which defines if they would be able win the game or not.

Using the football match experience, imagine you are a player in Team A and your other team mates are your friends. The opposing team are the obstacles that plan to stop you from scoring and they want to score you, the trainings and daily exercises done by your team (TEAM A) are the steps taken to defeat the other team, the coach of your team is your mentor, the Goal post is your vision, and scoring a goal means you have achieved your vision and finally the referee is the person in charge of the match.

With this, in achieving a goal, you must

1. Be able to develop the skills, character and strength required to achieve your goals.

2. Have good friends that have the same vision with you so you can achieve a common goal.

3. Have good plans and tactics that would help you in achieving your goals.
4. Be sure to always write down all the plans you need to achieve your goals.

5. Be determined to take all the necessary steps that have been put in place to achieve your goal.

6. Be focused and concentrate, and always have it in mind that you are good enough to achieve all your goals even when they seem unachievable.

7. Be far away from distractions and side Attractions.

8. Have a mentor or a coach that would serve as a senior guide to achieving your goals.

Decide who would be the referee over your game, because the referee is always meant to be in charge of any game. The referee is always there to guide you when you are missing a step you are supposed to take to achieve your goals, and to caution you when you are getting things wrong.

Note that People are often best at being the coach but God is the best referee ever.

I realised that most people don’t set goals because

1. They don’t have a vision

2. They believe that there is nothing important (no big deal) in setting goals.

3. They believe that setting goals is very hard.

4. They stopped setting because they weren’t achieving the goals they set.

5. Fear of failure and rejection.

6. They have not found out their strengths and weaknesses so they don’t want to set goals that are above their capacity.

7. They move with friends that don’t set goals.

8. They feel that once they achieve the goals there would be nothing more to achieve again.

9. They are scared of taking risks and making sacrifices to achieve their goals.

EXERCISE`: Within the next couple of minutes, think of why you don’t set goals and write them down in a place you can always remember.

Goal setting is very important because

1. Goal setting inspires direction: If you never set a goal, how would you know where you are going to?

2. Goal Setting Improves You And Makes You Better

3. Goals Setting Helps To Simplify Your Vision

4. Goal setting tells you if you are improving, just there or you are going below the standard you used to be before.

5. Goal Setting Makes You Better Than Your Best.

6. Goal Setting Narrows Choices. It helps you know what and what is important for now so you can work on them.

7. Goal Setting Increases Confidence

8. Goal setting make you belief in your ability because if you set goals, you believe you can achieve them.

9. It helps to identify your strength and expose your weakness.

10. Goal setting improves your self esteem

11. Goal setting makes you positive.

EXERCISE: Within the next couple of minutes, write down how you think Goal setting can be of importance to you.

If you have not seen any reason, calm down and relax because I am sure very soon you would find so many reasons to set Goals.

Seun Emmanuel Alaofin (SEA)

To be continued.

CHARACTER: WHO WE ARE ON THE INSIDE

I believe it is a normal human desire to be concerned about how we look on the outside. There’s nothing wrong with that. What can get us in trouble is worrying more about how we look on the outside than about how we really are on the inside. Our reputation comes from what others believe about our outside. Our character represents who we are on the inside. And the good news is that if you focus on being better on the inside than the outside, over time you will also become better on the outside.

Why do I say that?

THE INSIDE INFLUENCES THE OUTSIDE: More than twenty-five hundred years ago, the Proverbs writer noted that as we think in our hearts, so we become. That ancient idea has been both echoed by other wisdom writers and confirmed by modern science. Coaches teach the importance of visualization for winning. Psychologists point out the power of self-image on people’s actions.

Doctors note the impact of positive attitude and hope on healing.
What we believe really matters. We reap what we sow. what we do or neglect to do in the privacy of our daily lives impacts who we are. If you neglect your heart, mind, and soul, it changes who you are on the outside as well as the inside.

INSIDE VICTORIES PRECEDE OUTSIDE ONES: If you do the things you need to do when you need to do them, then someday you can do the things you want to do when you want to do them. In other words, before you can do, you must be.

I have often observed people who seemed to be doing all the right things on the outside, yet they were not experiencing success. When that happens, I usually conclude that something is wrong on the inside and needs to be changed. The right motions outwardly with wrong motives inwardly will not bring lasting progress. Right outward talking with wrong inward thinking will not bring lasting success.

Expressions of care on the outside with a heart of hatred or contempt on the inside will not bring lasting peace. Continual growth and lasting success are the result of aligning the inside and the outside of our lives. And getting the inside right must come first—with solid character traits that provide the foundation for growth.

OUR INSIDE DEVELOPMENT IS TOTALLY WITHIN OUR CONTROL: We often cannot determine what happens to us, but we can always determine what happens within us.

Jim Rohn said, Character is a quality that embodies many important traits such as integrity, courage, perseverance, confidence, and wisdom. Unlike your fingerprints that you were born with and can’t change, character is something that you create within yourself and must take responsibility for changing.

When we fail to make the right character choices within us, we give away ownership of ourselves. We belong to others—to whatever gains control of us. And that puts us in a bad place. How can you ever reach your potential and become the person you can be if others are making your choices for you?

Several years ago, teenage millionaire phenomenon Farrah Gray wrote a book called Reallionaire. He coined the term to describe “someone who has discovered that there is more to money than having money. A person who understands that success is not just about being rich in your pocket; you have to be rich on the inside, too.” At a tender age, he recognized that money without a strong character foundation can lead not to success but to ruin.

If you have any doubt, just look at the number of famous child actors and young pop stars who have crashed and burned. Their stories are often sad because they focused on the externals of life instead of building internally to give themselves a strong foundation when fame and fortune came. Theirs is a fate we need to work hard to avoid by focusing on improving on the inside more than the outside.
This article was written By John C Maxwell and it was taken from his website to speak to our youths.